Simon Cowell’s Last Season of ‘American Idol’ Prompts My Last Season of Being an American

beforehand Paula Abdul. Now, the unthinkable: Simon Cowell has announced that this choose be his last season as a connoisseur on American Idol. Cue whatever the antithesis of this GIF is:

Oh stoppage, pretty sure it’s this:

American fetish without Simon Cowell is like an establish bar without hours of barfing afterwards: It is against every bones law of the Universe.
We knew things on heroine were headed in a new administering with the addition of Kara Dioguardi, a bikini-clad songwriter who added teeny if anything to the chemistry of our favorite threesome. Then, our most respected lady Paula Abdul was let investigate as a judge over the Summer, replaced in preference to with comedian Ellen Degeneres. Sure, we intended Ellen, but Paula had kind of behoove the two-legged dog of genuineness television: Adorable, a little sad, charming, puzzling, might have some trouble walking, but in the tip, we can’t imagine a age without her.
But we pushed because of because, frankly, Cowell was the adhesive that held this beautiful sometime caravan wreck of a show together. in estrus Jackson is, of course, the eyecandy.
While Cowell plans on focusing more on his latest English gist to hit the states, X intermediary, we all know that is solely code for spending the next handful years polishing each and every start in his McDuck pool using Susan Boyle’s leftover eyebrow hair's breadth. And that ain’t right.
So release it be known*: Without Simon Cowell, not just will we stop watching American ikon. We will stop being American absolutely.
*We kid. We will always accompany Idol. Never leave us. xoxo
original is here